I never wrote on my parents especially for my mother. I always longing for motherly love. I always believe that she sees me as her competitor or treat me like I'm an adult one. She is mother and I'm daughter this the only lacking thing in our relationship.
Almost all the days in our family starts with bitter conversation of my parents same like quarrel. As my mother never miss the chance to be rebellious in front of anyone. May be reason for quarrel is our dept or absence of wealth. She is straight forward in replying anything to anyone. My father expecting too much from her in fact in all the tiny things, but she never flow with it. It's from my one of the great concern that my father too never accept things from her as things are. Apart from it, He always believe that if he is unsuccessful today only because of my mother that she didn't support him. Thus, ever if I take the side of my father she starts thinking that I'm same like my father and against of her but it's not real thing.
There is always one repentance in my life that, when I was in menstruation period very first time... She saws the blood on my bottom wear though she didn't clarify what it is? where I was total unknown to this physical change. It is the thing always gives tears in my eyes. What she teach me is all about how to maintain clarity of home. If I spend my whole day in house chores or in cooking she will start loving me for that. I feel how to care for children's liking or disliking is the lacking in her. She never thinks that how to spend the life is everyone's own choice. As far the concern of how to use time is dependent on own choice but if she found me holding book for more than hour she starts interrupting.
In this all cases she found me as mature that I don't need any of her advice at all, but though she keep on finding my faults in whatever things I do.
I saw many mothers boasting about their daughters. I never wants that type of mother. In fact I'm used to with my mother. Everyday we have some happy moments too. All this write up doesn't mean she is not taking care where I'm sick or etc., She is always there but somehow she always puts me alone to tackle with everything if it's making Mohanthal very first time or fighting with myself for existing. Even I should say I like to celebrate my birth day but before that birth my mother faced a painfilull months. I'm very unknown to it. I should sacrifice my everything for that painful days &nights of her! After all my existence is only boon by her. At last, I just want that at least she should feel pride for her daughter that her daughter is not same in the crowd.
Today, I got this boldness to write the truth it's all cause of her.The reason behind it's the only that I learn it from her behaviour... How to speak truth!
Almost all the days in our family starts with bitter conversation of my parents same like quarrel. As my mother never miss the chance to be rebellious in front of anyone. May be reason for quarrel is our dept or absence of wealth. She is straight forward in replying anything to anyone. My father expecting too much from her in fact in all the tiny things, but she never flow with it. It's from my one of the great concern that my father too never accept things from her as things are. Apart from it, He always believe that if he is unsuccessful today only because of my mother that she didn't support him. Thus, ever if I take the side of my father she starts thinking that I'm same like my father and against of her but it's not real thing.
There is always one repentance in my life that, when I was in menstruation period very first time... She saws the blood on my bottom wear though she didn't clarify what it is? where I was total unknown to this physical change. It is the thing always gives tears in my eyes. What she teach me is all about how to maintain clarity of home. If I spend my whole day in house chores or in cooking she will start loving me for that. I feel how to care for children's liking or disliking is the lacking in her. She never thinks that how to spend the life is everyone's own choice. As far the concern of how to use time is dependent on own choice but if she found me holding book for more than hour she starts interrupting.
In this all cases she found me as mature that I don't need any of her advice at all, but though she keep on finding my faults in whatever things I do.
I saw many mothers boasting about their daughters. I never wants that type of mother. In fact I'm used to with my mother. Everyday we have some happy moments too. All this write up doesn't mean she is not taking care where I'm sick or etc., She is always there but somehow she always puts me alone to tackle with everything if it's making Mohanthal very first time or fighting with myself for existing. Even I should say I like to celebrate my birth day but before that birth my mother faced a painfilull months. I'm very unknown to it. I should sacrifice my everything for that painful days &nights of her! After all my existence is only boon by her. At last, I just want that at least she should feel pride for her daughter that her daughter is not same in the crowd.
Today, I got this boldness to write the truth it's all cause of her.The reason behind it's the only that I learn it from her behaviour... How to speak truth!
Happy Mother's Day 2020.
#CoronaEpidemic
#lockdown effect #StayHomeStaySafe.
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